Asshole nannies!

So yesterday my asshole nanny came to work. She is the lady who cleans our shop, and for some reason my son warships her so now she has become his at work nanny. It is helpful because I actually get work done while I’m there. However yesterday she let him stay up with out a nap until 5 fucking PM. Then kindly left him with me to deal with. So I’m stuck at home last night with a sleeping child at 5. I was super annoyed because I didn’t think he would sleep until morning. I was right. At 5:45 he had a bad dream. The next thing I knew he was in a full melt down mode. For the first 35 minutes I think he was still half asleep and stuck in the dream so he was just going ape shit. Full on snot, booger, tear crying. Shaking, twitching and all around losing his Goddamn mind people. Finally he came out of the dream but was in a state of total over tiredness that he continued to scream for almost two more hours. Let me tell you how bad I wanted to kill someone, anyone at all yesterday. Well except for my son, because hell if I didn’t feel so terrible for him.

Do you know how I know he was in a really bad way? Because I got so desperate I started doing irrational shit to make him happy. Including offering him oodles and oodles of chocolate. But people my son was so sad and upset and tired he turned down chocolate. I don’t know what was more heartbreaking, his crying or that he didn’t want chocolate. He didn’t want milk, water, food, medicine, daddy, mama, papa or Elmo. Yeah we were in defcon 2 people, my son was pissed. Somehow I finally turned on Mickey Mouse (hate hate hate mouska mouska wtf is that shit) and he sort of calmed down. I finally went in to change his diaper and we turned Mermaid on in his room and laid down and the next thing I knew he was out.

Ohhh but it wasn’t over. Around ten I found a little boy in my bed, and he only wanted me to cuddle him. Which meant laying on my right side (seering death pain, sleeping on right side while pregnant) and letting him sleep on my arm. So while I got zero sleep last night, he had a terrific night of sleep and woke up happy and chipper so I didn’t mind. It actually felt good having him lay in bed with me and need me. As he gets older those moments where he needs his mommy are few and far between.

If that nanny comes in today though you can bet I’m going to give her a piece of my mind…I better wear ugly shoes so they don’t get dirty when I put my foot up her ass!

3 thoughts on “Asshole nannies!

  1. Poor you. That would freak me out totally. How do you calm an inconsolable little boy? Yikes. Wouldn\’t you like to crawl into mommy\’s bed when you feel shitty? Makes everything ok again. It is cute how they grow more and more independent but when they have a bad dream crawl into mommy\’s bed for comfort.


  2. Yes I agree I wish I could have crawled into MY mommy\’s bed last night. Ugh HATE sleeping alone.Poor Brandon! I hope he is back on chocolate now that it\’s all over!


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