This weekend should have caused me to have a mental overload

Things my child did this weekend

  • He put a handful of soap in his hair, spiked it up and declared it washed, then..
  • He cut his own hair!
  • With scissors
  • Then he cut holes in my favorite shirt of his
  • He spent the rest of the weekend declaring he got a haircut
  • In an attempt to throw his cupcake outside he instead threw it so it landed half on my wall and half outside
  • While I was cleaning cupcake bits off the floor and wall he was busy eating said cupcake off the dirty sandy patio out back
  • When I asked him to get off the toilet and get dressed he informed me, “no, I just have more poop in my butt, I not done.”
  • I walked in to find him flushing his pajama pants down the toilet, then pulling them out and swinging them over his head like a lasso
  • I told him no, came back and found him flushing an entire roll of baby wipes down the toilet
  • It was time to eat so I gave him some cream of wheat, which he decided to eat with his fingers
  • He also decided to smear cream of wheat HEAD TO TOE down his body, across my table and on my chairs
  • I laid out his outfit for the day, a cute pair of brown and orange board shorts with a hibiscus flower and a wife beater, he exclaimed to Rob, “I NOT WEAR THESE SHORTS THEY TO FOWERY”
  • Followed by, “Dad, these shorts are fower power”
  • I then walked in on him flushing a crayon down the toilet. He went to time out, came out and …
  • Flushed another crayon down the toilet while dying of laughter
  • Responded to everything Rob told him with SO SO SO SO SO!
  • Then he body slammed Codi and made him scream
  • Then it was time for another meal. He put a couple bites of food in his mouth, chewed it and then turned his head to the right and spit it about two feet across the floor
  • He thought this was hysterical
  • I did not
  • Finally he looked at me and said, “mama, you a girl, and I’m a guy, I’m a guy and a kid”
  • “And mama, you a pincess, mama is a pincess”


8 thoughts on “This weekend should have caused me to have a mental overload

  1. Yikes! That boys sounds like a ball of energy! Porgie threw her sippy cup in the toilet a few weeks ago. When I took it out of the toilet and threw it away, she was very upset. She hasn\’t thrown anything else in there, but I am sure that will change once we start potty training.


  2. Ok seriously- at LEAST he thinks you are a princess and not the evil stepmother witch!!! OMG I don\’t even want to THINK about Cole growing up and spitting things. I will lock him in the dungeon! ;-P


  3. Haha. This blog makes me so happy. I wiped my forehead and went \”few\” when i grabbed my pastry scissors from Lyndle right after he forcefully opened and closed them….naked right in front of his little package. HE COULD HAVE CHOPPED IT OFF FOR HEAVENS SAKE. I just said \”Thank God for saving me from that one.\” But then when his he came home from daycare with cuts in his nice pants, I was all up in arms about, \”what the hell were you doing with scissors at school?\” Freaks me out. Adalee had a rash on her cheeks a few weeks back. Really irritated, sensitive skin accross her face cheeks, uniform on both sides. I never knew what caused it until one night I heard Lyndle say \”Wash you face Adalee.\” Peeked around the corner. Had soap and was washing her face. That was the cause of the rash. Haha.I think Brandon and Lyndle are a lot alike. We should get them together. He has yet to body slam Adalee but he has bitten her face, arms, legs, finger, toes and back. He likes to give her hugs but then doesnt let go and falls to the ground taking her with him and wont let go. Doesnt matter what body part of hers he lands on. \”Dangit son, get off her head.\”Oh the joys of two!!!Sorry for the novel. I feel like typing today.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s