Didja know its delurker week? 

What is delurking?  Well, its where all of you readers come out of the wood work and let all of your blogger buddies know you are reading.  I know there are a lot of readers out there, who read but are afraid to comment, and this is your chance to come out and let us know you are reading. Knowing we have readers is a great way to make us writers feel like we have a reason to keep writing. So my bloggy buddies, come out come out where ever you are, leave me a comment and delurk!  It’s also a great way to get you out of your rss readers.  I know so many of you read but don’t have the patience to click out of your Google readers, so click out man!

In honor of delurking week I’m going to tell all of you a little bit about me.

First, lets discuss three things that drive me bonkers.

Thing one.  When you buy a brand new tube of chapstick, pull it out in the car and put it on.  In them midst of that, you drop the fucking lid.  I couldn’t find the goddamn lid which meant I had to drive around with my chapstick propped up in just the right spot in my car.  If not, since I drive a mom car, if that chapstick tipped over anywhere in my vehicle it would inevitably end up covered in crumbs and dirt and all kinds of other child yuckies.  Of course it would be my luck that I would grab said toxic chapstick and spread it all over my lips before realizing what I had just done.  So, for the last two weeks I have been driving around with my chapstick meticulously placed like this.

That is a pain in the ass, because I can’t just reach into my console to grab something with out worrying that I will cover my chapstick in hair and junk.  DRIVES ME FUCKING NUTS.

 

Thing 2

Every day I take a shower.  I get out of the shower douse myself in lotion and then put on deodorant.  The issue?  Have you ever tried to take a fucking deodorant lid off with your hands covered in lotion? IT IS IMPOSSIBLE.  I end up having to find a towel, cover both hands and pry that bastard off.  You might ask,"but Shannon why not put the deodorant on first?  I swear I mean to ever time.  But I am so habit forming that I can’t seem to break that habit.  I can not for the life of me remember to put the deodorant on first.  You would think I would stop so I didn’t annoy the fuck out of myself every day.

Thing 3

I went to the doctor the other day and they asked for a urine sample.  I was thrilled because I walked in and had to pee like a motherfucker.  I ran to the bathroom, grabbed the cup and NOTHING.  Can I just tell you how badly I get stage fright when I have to pee in a cup?  Worse, I get stage fright peeing in public restrooms.  Yup, if I going into a bathroom and someone is in the stall next to me, I freeze up and can’t pee until they leave.

Yes.  I am weird.

 

Lets see.  I’m married, to the very best husband ever.  We have the strangest relationship on the planet, and by strange I mean, we are actually happy, and we still love each other.  He still grabs my ass every day, and I still find myself rubbing on his muscular arms or soft chest and belly.

He makes me laugh every day…even when he does shit like this

But then he redeems himself

He lets me drag him out to the park and the library with our kids, and goes willingly

He even lets me come to baseball games with him, and doesn’t get "too" mad when I ask questions every 14 seconds. (In my defense before the game he told me I had free reign on asking any question I wanted so I could get more familiar withe game.  He sooo didn’t know what he was signing up for).  The best part is, I walked away really loving that night, and I’m eager now to see many more games with him

I have two of the most amazing little boys.  Codi, my sweet little clown.  Always so happy. He is growing so big.  He can walk down stairs with out sitting on his butt and scooting.  He talks in full sentences now.  He can throw a mean punch.  And he loves his brother more then anything.

He is always doing something new to make me laugh.  He finds delight in the small things.  Codi was the second child I almost didn’t have.  I had made a decision to have only one child.  But one day, something clicked in my head, divine intervention and I knew I needed one more.  Sometimes I feel like God made sure I had this little boy, because he knew he was the one thing missing from our family.  When I was pregnant with him I almost lost him and spent 7 months on bedrest.  Those 7 months were well worth it to get this little man.

Even though my little Codi bug doesn’t eat much, he sure does delight in the moments he does choose to eat.

Codi loves being outside, he loves chasing me on his bike, but most of all he loves making me laugh.

 

My first born Brandon is…the most important thing I’ve ever done.  I raised him knowing nothing about being a mom.  I raised him with my moms words in the back of my head, "no matter what I do in life, he will be the best thing I ever did.

Even if he is going through a time where he loves his dad the most, I try and squeeze in a little mommy time with him.  We like to spend time cooking together.

Although sometimes cooking means throwing caution into the wind and making s’mores in our fireplace.

My Brandon is a genius.  I’ve never met a child as smart as him.  I’ve never known a kid with such strong emotions.  But let me tell you, when Brandon is happy, he is happy with his whole body.  He shows his happiness with his most amazing smile (he sooo got that from his mom.  He also already has the most perfect driving skills that I’ve ever seen, he drives better then some 20 year olds I know.

He delights and making me laugh with the silliest little things, and I’m already sad for every girl’s heart he breaks in high school.

I also have a wonderful support system in the form of my family

My mom is the best grandma ever she makes my boys their own birthday cakes

She doesn’t get mad when my boys do things like this to her Thanksgiving pie

She does an excellent job baby sitting my kids, and they come home only slightly different then we left them, (I men what is a little paint right)

My dad, is the boys idol.  I’ve never seen two boys idolize someone so much.  It is often said that my dad is steel and my boys are magnets.  There is NOTHING on the planet that my dad wouldn’t do for these boys.  Some of his favorites are, getting them out of time out, buying them secret popsicles, and being a total sucker for their puppy dog eyes.

Papa, always makes sure to teach my kids the important things in life.  He taught Brandon all about birds.

Yes, I have two of the best parents a girl could ask for.

While I’m bragging I should mention my friends.

My friend Ginger has more patience with my boys then I’ve ever known a friend to have.  When she walks in the boys run to her and immediately try to drag her into the other room to play.  Aside from her patience with them, she has the most incredible amount of patience for me.  She tolerates my crazy, my emotional mood swings, my ridiculous out looks on life.  She gets me.

She is also notorious for letting them eat raw cookie dough when I’m not looking, and also letting them help us bake Christmas cookies.

Sometimes her bright ideas with my boys lead to cookie sheets that look like this.

I won’t even begin to tell you what my floor looked like after her genius idea to leave the little shit heads alone with all of the sprinkles.

I am thankful for my friend Katie, who trusted ME enough to watch her amazing little boy Dylan for nearly 8 months.  You can’t imagine the kind of trust it takes for a person to leave their child with you.  I can’t tell you how honored I felt ever day she brought him to me.

Katie has always been willing to geek out with me too, just ask her, we have a whole song about wet panties..I’ll let you make of that what you want.

I have the best cousin ever, who has never hesitated to get dressed up, go out, get trashed and make total asses of ourselves.  If only I had scanned the pictures of us drunk in college acting like total dumb asses.

Oh wait look, I found a couple pictures

**Edited to add, my cousin said I didnt put good enough pics of us up so fine, here proof that we are total retards.

I have the most amazing bloggy buddies, especially my dear dear dear Patty.  She is one of the sweetest kind hearted people I’ve ever known and I can’t tell you how lucky I was to meet her through the blog world.  See people this is why you need to delurk, you never know what kind of friends you are missing out one.

 

I extra special love Patty because she mails me NYC bagels and pizza and twice has knitted me two of the most beautiful scarves I’ve ever seen That I cherish more then anything.

I am lucky to have one of the greatest little cousins ever. She looks up to me so much, which I think about every day. I love knowing that someone sees me, crazy, mislead, chaotic, as a role model. She noticed my relationship with Rob and she wants something like that. Knowing there is a person out there who wants the same things I have, makes me feel like, I’m doing at least one thing right in the world. Not to mention she doesn’t give me too much hell when I stack her desk full of shit to do, and she even let me drag her all over Reno to take a gazillion senior pictures of her.  She loves me so much she wont even get mad that I post pictures of her when she was a weee little girl.

 

 I guess that leaves me a perpetual dieter.  A crazy girl with a misguided view of life.  I’m mostly naive.  I have a tenancy to trust all the wrong people, a habit of following my heart, and a knack for acting like a total jackass at times.  I would do anything and everything for my boys and my family.  My kids are my life, and like I said they are the best things I will ever do as long as I live.  I found a man who was my savior, who tolerates every mood swing, every ridiculous thing that comes out of my mouth, and every time I shove my cold hands up his shirt just do get warm.

I was brave enough to know when it was time to start taking medicine to keep me from being that wife who threw heavy things at her husband.  To prevent being the mom who screamed at her kids for nothing.  For never wanting to get off the couch.  I’m proud of myself for making the choice to get back to the gym and ENJOY IT.  I’ve learned to run a mile.  I almost have an arm muscle.  I would never show anyone but I have been known to secretly feel it when I’m all alone.  I write this blog to keep me sane.  So, that is why I ask you know, if you have actually made it through this entire post, please, delurk and let me know I’m not just writing for nothing.  I’m 28 and I still can’t spell definitly or immedietly.  I can’t do simple math without the help of Excel or a calculator.  And I’m not even ashamed to admit that in 4 years my son will be smarter then me.

So there you have it.  Shannon in a nutshell.  I love making my bloggy buddies laugh, I have a bad habit of cussing so don’t be stunned if my posts are loaded with words like fuck, shit, asshole motherfucker cocksucker.  I hope you enjoy reading my blog, as much as I enjoy writing it for you.  Anyway in honor of delurking week, leave me a comment, let me know you are out there!