Swistle posted a blog about a fight she was having with her husband. Not a big money, religious, life threatening fight, but a fight about MATH that resulted in broken things.
HILARIOUS.
She asked commenters to tell her some of their, "are we seriously about to divorce over this" fights. So I am going to give you Rob and I's two most ridiculous fights that turned nuclear and then I want you to comment and tell me your most ridiculous fights that went from 0-30 in seconds.
Fight 1:
I don't know how we got on the topic but once when I was nine months pregnant with Brandon we some how got on the topic of how much I loved my cat. Since I had only had a cat I couldn't fathom loving anything more then him. He was the love of my life how could I love this kid I didn't know more then my sweet wittle kitty cat? (I was pregnant and hormonal). He was right but I was NOT giving in on this. I went psychotic. Screaming, throwing things. Unplugging his Playstation TWICE. Hiding his keys and just having a full mental break down. To this day I find it hilarious that when Codi was born I actually gave my cat away. I guess I could love something more.
Fight 2:
I had spent all day making ribs. Marinating, and seasoning and baking forever. When we sat down to eat he went and got a giant bowl of fish sauce to dip his ribs in.
I LOST MY SHIT.
How in the fuck could he put my ribs in that nasty garbage shit. Why did I even bother seasoning the if he was just going to cover them in that shit. It was disrespectful and rude of him to do that. This fight was crazy. I was crying, and livid HOW DARE HE cover up all that flavor I had worked to achieve. This went from a fight over food to a cultural fight. His culture dunked food in stupid nasty shit. We didn't talk for two days over the fish sauce. When we finally started talking again he had the nerve to put hot sauce all over something. I wondered if he could even fucking taste what I made with all of that sauce on it. Then he covered something in ketchup and I swear I wanted to walk out.
So…condiments. Condiments are going to end my marriage.
Now tell me….what are your stupid little fights that turn into big huge giant call a divorce lawyer fights????
misguidedmommy.com 
omg FISH SAUCE?! does that even belong near ribs? sorry, girl i feel your pain on that one. i once has a bf who salted everything before tasting. RUDE! anyway, we fight about when the sheets are not perfectly straight. i call it an obination, and he could care less. that and dishwasher loading skill or his lack there of.
LikeLike
Mathers: Rob gets mad at me all the time about how I load the dishwasher. He gets so mad at it he walks away and says he can’t look at it
LikeLike
Washing clothes, he always makes sure I am doing it “right.” I will cuss him out over that shit.
We got into a huge fight one time because I mentioned our high electric bill to my f.i.l. and hubby said I share too much personal info. SERIOUSLY?? We were just having basic conversation!! I was so pissed we got into a huge fight and we almost split up. I was so tired of him attacking me being “too loud” or “too friendly”. I am who I am and he cannot change me, I will always be me, whether he likes it or not!
LikeLike
I howled at your fish sauce story. Whether it’s Worcestershire sauce or ketchup, the same thing happens to me all the time. Husband will actually come home from work to a fresh, hot dinner, discover we’re out of ketchup and leave it cooling on the table while he drives to the store to get more ketchup. Whatever happened to just eating the damn food? Sheesh!
LikeLike
Kristy: I would probably never wash anything of his again.
Mary: dude. I have started giving ketchup the evil eye every time I open the fridge. I swear if he ever left to get ketchup with food waiting I would loak his ass out he can eat ketchup with a spoon for dinner.
LikeLike
My husband covers everything in hot sauce too. I don’t think it is a cultural thing. It is just a stupid man thing.
I don’t think I’ve ever had a serious fight with my husband. EVERY SINGLE FIGHT is stupid and insignificant. We just got in a fight yesterday about dinner parties. Basically, people invite us over for dinner, but I never invite them over. I am not an entertaining guest type of girl. I don’t really like cooking and it all just seems stressful. But my husband acts like I am not living up to my expectations as a house wife or something. I told him if he wants to invite people over for dinner, he can cook and he can clean the house and he can stress about all the details.
LikeLike
Oh the dipping is my fucking breaking point. I slaved all day over whateverithappenstobe and you’re going to dip it in ketchup??? Oh, I DON’T THINK SO!
I’d rather throw the food in the garbage.
LikeLike
Saly: We seriously had such a big fight over it. And this weekend he went and PURCHASED a burrito from SOMEWHERE ELSE and then got 7 containers of salsa stuff to pour on it and even that made me angry. I asked him why he even bothers spending 9.00 on a burrito he’s just going to cover in sauce. I really really don’t know why this makes me so mad but it does.
LikeLike
Do you think the person that makes the chip gets mad people dip them in salsa. What about the hot dog that gets ketchup and mustard on it and you never taste the hot dog. Rob has had that burrito 100 times. It taste the same today as it did the first time he ate it. So I’m sure he knows it needs sauce. I see you put that green Tabasco shit on all kinds of things now.
LikeLike
Girl, I think I’d go ballistic if someone dipped ANYTHING I made in fish sauce…………… My husband dips everything in Ranch… We’re from TX ya but still WTF….
I’m a co-writer of Three Fabulous Mommies feel free to stop by and see our antics! We’d love to see ya on there Lovely Lady!!
http://3fabulousmommies.blogspot.com/
LikeLike
I’m so sorry Shannon for your pain. That is just a cultural thing. Hey, have you seen Mikey Bustos YouTube videos?
LikeLike
God I think this is the first time I have been on a blog in weeks! Freaken kids. Anyway….
My husband will come home and see I have had a hard day. He will nicely say “Why don’t you go for a run” or “Why don’t you try to hit up a Zumba class”… I get all snake neck on him and ask “Are you calling me Fat–because that is the LAST thing I need today” (munching chips). He insists no, and I insist no sex for the week. Clearly he should have walked through the door offering a box of ho ho’s and the outcome would have been different.
LikeLike
Fish sauce, huh? LMAO
I think our biggest fights come when he says something and I don’t hear him (HELLO, I’M FACEBOOKING!!!!). He doesn’t understand my love and connection to Facebook and thinks I should find what he has to say more important. Don’t ask me why! And then he gets so mad that he won’t even tell me what he said. Of course, it doesn’t help that I only hear him if he’s A. Talking to the TV or B. Talking to one of the dogs. Ooops!
Or when I don’t understand what he said. And then I ask him to repeat it and he talks like he has shit in his mouth while whispering and I still don’t hear it. And this goes on until I think he probably wants to throw me out the front window. And he gets insulted that I didn’t understand his whispering shit-filled mouth talk. And that I answered with something that makes no sense because I didn’t understand what he said. At least I answered, right?
But I’m still super awesome, so he sticks around.
LikeLike
new blog = http://esttimeofarrival.blogspot.com, thanks for continuing to read me:)
Argument = who spends more time FBing on the phone. It’s so him, but he refuses to believe it. And when he’s FB’d the night away and I say something (lovingly, not like a nag, cuz I know what a drag that is), better watch out! Addict much?
LikeLike