Isn’t it funny how kids manage to find every single piece of forgotten discarded petrified food ever lost. Today Brandon found what I think is either a french fry or a piece of string cheese. I say THINK because I’m not quite sure. All I know is he found it hiding under his slide and after squishing it a few times he went to put it in his mouth. I took it away so he did the most logical thing he could. He went running around the office in search of something else gross to eat. He succeeded. He found what at first i thought was an old tomato. NOPE in fact it was a brown carrot. The carrot was brown because yesterday Brandon was rolling it around on the floor and then licking it (I was not present for this I only heard about it, I would have crapped myself at the utter grossness of it.) I made him give up the carrot and he stomped away in anger and went and threw all of his toy buckets of their toy shelf in protest. SIGH!

Man. Let me tell you. I am a full time working mom. I have the so called luxury of bringing my son to work. Although I’m sure most of you would think this is great. It was. Until he could walk. Then after he could walk it was horrible. He refiles all of my papers, shreds things with out using a shredder, clear my desk in 2 seconds flat and so on. That isn’t even what drives me nuts about work. What bugs me the most are the little things.
Example.
Good morning Weakland’s Heating & Air Shannon Speaking.
Hi (insert assenine name here) Shelia, shelly, jenna, janna, sharon, and so on.
Other example.
Shannon come here. So I run into the other office. “Can you get this phone number for me?” I could have sworn that the person asking me this was sitting right in front of their very own computer with all necessary numbers in it.
Next example
I have a girl in my office whose job is to file all the invoices I give her which I post at least ever two days. She also makes out the bank deposit and staples together purchases so I can post them and give them to her to file with the invoices. Daily she complains. She gets mad if I post invoices every day because then her box is never empty. So I begin posting every 3 days and she flips out that now I’m causing her to get backed up and can I please post daily. I go back to posting daily and yesterday she had the nerve to yell at me because I didn’t post until noon since I was doing other things. So I end up having to take the invoices out of her box and putting them in a pile on my desk so that she can as she says “look at an empty box on her desk for a day and feel relaxed”! ! ! ! ! ! ! EXCUSE ME. It makes me nuts. I can’t win people. Then as if this isn’t bad enough she says that I need to put chocolate on top of the invoices to make her less annoyed when I do give them to her.
Yet another example of why I hate stupid ass employees
I love when people are part time. They choose their schedule. They decide they only want to work two days a week and be lazy. But then they whine and complain and cry that they are broke. WELL there are 5 days of work here for you but you choose to do three. This isn’t my problem people. Shut up! Gosh if you don’t want to work DON’T but don’t come to work and complain about not working.
Sorry just needed to do a little venting there. I can’t type much I’m at work and today is that girls day off so I need to rush to do as much as I can and make sure all of her boxes are full for Monday so she doesn’t yell that I set her back. Although I’m sure that she will yell that I put to much in her boxes. So maybe I should just color pictures and pretend to work.

This will be my 307th post about how big my little boy is now. I was sitting at work doing something on the computer when this pops up in the background on my screen.

Mannnnnnnn. Now I have to get all sad and think of how little my baby IS NOT and this makes me open up my iPhoto and I come up with all of these. Geeeeeze
First Bath

First day home

Second day home

Looking cute

Deep thought about being on his belly

Again being cute

This will be my 307th post about how big my little boy is now. I was sitting at work doing something on the computer when this pops up in the background on my screen.

Mannnnnnnn. Now I have to get all sad and think of how little my baby IS NOT and this makes me open up my iPhoto and I come up with all of these. Geeeeeze
First Bath

First day home

Second day home

Looking cute

Deep thought about being on his belly

Again being cute

AND THEN DAD COMES HOME AND THE WHOLE WORLD IS RIGHT AGAIN AND MY HEART MELTS RIGHT OUT OF MY CHEST AND I RETRACT ALL PREVIOUS HEAD IN SAND WOE IS ME COMMENTS

P.S. No one tell my husband I posted pictures of him in nothing but his work thermals. Tee hee bad wifey!!!! Shhhhhhhhh

yeah this is my kid spinning himself in circles until he falls and cracks his head on the table letting out a noise I’m not entirely sure he has made before.

STRONGLY CONSIDERING CHANGING TITLE OF BLOG TO

TALES OF AN INSANO MOM ON THE VERGE OF LOSING WHAT IS LEFT OF HER MUSH BRAIN WISHING SHE COULD BURY HER HEAD IN THE SAND AND HIDE FROM THE CHILD.

Brandon has learned to jump off things. The pictures are slightly blurry because I had it set in continuous so I could catch him.
First he climbs up one side of the couch and jumps onto it.




After this he runs to the other side of the couch and psyches himself up to jump off.





Then he jumps off and starts over.

Please notice the Incredible’s on the TV in the background.

This is what happens when the Incredibles end and I’m covered in chicken so I can’t rush over and restart the movie.










To help you get it I have a bar that separates my kitchen and living room. This is what the string is wrapped around. I could have sworn I only had one cat but apparently my son is half Super hero half kitty cat.
Oh and to anyone who wants to comment on my stained carpet you have three choices;
1: You can remember that I have a one year old who delights in sucking chocolate milk up his straw and then watching it run out onto the carpet.
2: Send someone to clean my carpet.
3: Pay to have hardwood installed.
If you don’t want to do any of these then keep your dirty carpet comments to yourself.

Serious people. How many times can one child watch a movie. Emery I know you said Ezra was obsessed with Buzz Lightyear (I was affraid to type if for fear the he would magically be able to read the words and force you to turn on the movie.) But seriously I had no idea what you meant. This is my third freaking time today to watch this movie and probably the 28th time this week we have seen it. Brandon will not even resemble a well adjusted nice kid unless the Incredibles are on somewhere. So we Tivoed it in the living room and now it is on pretty much 24/7 unless he is asleep. Today at the store I made the rookie mistake of deciding to buy the actual movie while my son was in the cart with me. He immediately started screaming and shaking the box trying to pry it open and looking at me like he wanted me to pop the DVD in my mouth and make the movie play on my face. We rushed right home to the precious Tivo and turned on his beloved movie and all sanity was restored again. I’m not sure though how long I can stay sane watching this movie. I should just thank the Lord he is at least over Teletubbies. Because if I had to hear Uh oh Po, HI Tinky winky and tubby tustard one more time I think I would have blown up PBS. Oh the horror. I now fear having a girl and getting stuck watching some terrible movie such as the Little Mermaid (barf barf) all day.