Does your Walmart have anything in front of it? Mine has a nail salon and an eye glass place in front. Every time I walk out I check out the little nail salon for no good reason. Twice now though on two separate occasions I’ve looked in there to see men getting manicures. Now let me first say I see nothing wrong with men getting manicures at all. I do find it strange though that that would pick Walmart to get them, especially since it is a wide open space in the very front of the store where every single person has to pass to get out. Because of this I find it terribly hard to not giggle at them when I walk by. I don’t know why I find it funny. I mean, it’s Walmart and it has happened twice in one month that I’ve seen these extremely dorky looking men sitting there getting their manicures. Do you find it funny or is it only me who is giggling about this. I mean if your going to do it, go to a salon or a nail place where you are inside and no one can walk by and laugh at you.

You know I have to say I’m shocked at all of you. I really expected at least one person to question me having my tubes tied. I was totally stunned when no one tried to question me. Whoah. Anyway this time I know that I did the right thing. You know, when I had Brandon I would always walk around saying, “with our next kid…” or “next time”, or “if we have a girl.” This time however there is no next time. Not because I can’t, but because I just know I’m done. You see as many times as I sat there saying I WILL NEVER HAVE ANOTHER CHILD, after Brandon, a part of me always knew I was lying. I saved all his clothes, I saved all his gear, because deep down inside I knew I was the biggest liar ever on this earth and my pants were so far on fire they might as well have just turned to ash. I knew I wanted just one more. I knew I really wanted that one more to be a boy. While I joked about pink and pony tails and dolls and frills, deep down inside I somehow knew I was going to have two little boys and be done. So I had my tubes tied and I’m happy. While I know I’ll never sit there saying, wow I wish I had another, I know there are other things that will seem weird. I know it will be totally weird never thinking, OMG am I pregnant every time I throw up or have a weird symptom. It will be weird knowing Rob and I can free willy it all we want and nothing can ever happen. I honestly think that part of it will be a huge adjustment. Sort of like this last pregnancy was an adjustment. I was so prepared for an uphill battle that when I got pregnant like over night I didn’t know what to do with myself. Thats how I think this will feel. I don’t know what I will do with out having to think about condoms first, or birth control or the oops he was too drunk to pull out. I mean, really do you know how strange it will be to have no responsibility? Shit, this is going to be like high school all over again!

SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME HOW ONE LARGE FRESH EGG IS 73 CALORIES, HOWEVER 1 LARGE HARD BOILED EGG IS 77 CALORIES? HMMMM HOW DOES AN EGG GAIN 3 CALORIES BY BEING COOKED?

Saturday I was making some toast to go with my cream of wheat. I sat down and ate breakfast and later came back in the kitchen to clean up and make some lunch. I wondered who made toast. Then I realized I had made it but forgotten to eat it. Dummy.

This morning I was making coffee and then I went to make some hard boiled eggs. I went to pour my coffee and noticed the coffee pot was never turned on. I’m doing good. I went to grab my toast and realized I never pushed it down or plugged it in. Wow I’m on some kind of roll here huh?

On another note. Do you do anything sort of gross? I’m really into clean things. Clean stove, clean kitchen and twice washed dishes. However, every morning I grab the coffee pot dump out yesterdays coffee and then just do a little swish with water and start over. I don’t know why I don’t wash the pot with soap each time. Is this gross? Do you use soap every morning? Do you have something half gross you do every day?

I’m sitting here in my kitchen cooking up a tasty batch of soup for the week trying to watch the Food Network. No wait, scratch that, I’m watching just fine, I just can’t hear a fucking thing. What’s that you say Bobby, I CAN’T HEAR YOU! Yet I go in my bedroom, the tv with the “real” Tivo and low and behold I can fucking hear what Bobby is saying. Now I’m sitting here trying to reset the slut DVR which is even more boring because I don’t even get to watch the show and make up what they are saying. I imagine right now Bobby is saying, “you know even though I married that hot Law and Order blond, I really should have married that Shannon girl who I never met, shes kind of amazing.” Sounds about right to me. So with no sound I’m left to sit here and stare at my soup pot. And you know, a watch pot never boils, so I’m not even getting any action in there.

Anyway I went to the store today. We have snow here in Reno. Did you know that snow makes people drive like asshole cocksucker motherfucking retards morons. No, really. They are all, hey look at me, I suddenly can’t drive like a sane person. It also means that no one can park a car to save their ever loving lives. Seriously it’s not that goddamn hard. Let’s combine that with the holiday shopping and holy fuck me is parking a pain. I go to Target today to buy ONE item. One thing. I try to pull down an isle to park and this car is blocking the way. Suddenly this guy walks up to the car to meet the passenger and she gets out and they go merrily on their way. Asshole driver continues sitting there. So I decide to pull around him and discover he is waiting for some lady who can’t reverse for shit, to pull out so he can have her super close spot. He sees me try and pull around and gets all kinds of threatened and starts inching closer so that I can’t pull forward more and the lady can’t back out more. Grrrrrr. Soooo I now have to reverse. I then pull into the next isle and low and behold there is a super close spot. In fact it is the spot right in front of the spot that asshole was waiting for. He finally pulls in and proceeds to give me evil eye because he assumed I was going to try and steal his spot. What I found even more annoying is that he was actually just dropping that girl off who was already in the store, and then he was going to wait in his fucking car. So all that shit and waiting and parking lot annoyance was just so the fucker could sit in his car. I don’t even tell you how much I wanted to ram his car with my cart. Then I get out of the store and I try and back out and EVERYONE AND THEIR MOM thinks they have to walk behind me. Never mind I’m 2/3 of the way out of the parking spot, they want to just keep walking behind me. And don’t even get me started on the fact that people park all crooked and retarded like because they pretend they can’t find the lines due to the 1 inch of melted snow we have left.

I HATE THE SNOW!

And yes I know this is the part where Ginger goes, (please read in sarcastic mocking tone) “well Shannon you’ve lived here 26 years you should know it snows by now, and if you don’t like it move, and it’s not like you can do anything about it so maybe you should just shut up about it.” Ya ya ya Ginger I know I know, and if I could only convince my parents to move somewhere with out slut bitch snow I would. And whatever I’ve lived here 26 years, thanks for reminding me how old I am.

I HATE SNOW! Only thing making the snow worth it right now is seeing my kids all bundled up in their super cute snow gear, as I take pictures of them from the safety of the INSIDE of my home! I’ll be back now I have to go dig the fucking Tigger Christmas blowy uppy thing out of the fucking snow!